Many believers want to make disciples but do not know how to disciple. The term “disciple” has become a buzzword that everyone is using, as they share a few making-disciples verses here and there to sound hip. However, when Jesus made disciples, He did practical things that we can duplicate.
One of the key things we must grasp when learning how to disciple others into being like Jesus is that our role is to challenge them. This is a lot different than the “don’t run anyone off” efforts of the megachurch. While we are not trying to be offensive, we have to put healthy challenges before disciples or they will never grow up.
Jesus did not have to tell people to leave or to stop crowding Him. He did not have to look hard to find those with true discipleship potential. Simply by putting pressure on His hearers, He could see who was truly teachable. Maybe we could call it teaching tension: “let the dead bury their dead, but you follow Me”; “go back and tell your family what I have done for you”; “do not tell anyone what has happened”; “go and announce that the Kingdom of God has come”; and “go, sell what you have and give to the poor.” Challenges like these separated the wheat from the chaff.

How to disciple by using growth “challenges”

Don’t just use random challenges. They need to be meaningful. For example, you are working with a person who is stuck at the moment from going on to be like Jesus because he refuses to forgive someone. So, you give him teachable tension: “Go read Matthew 18 and pray about how it applies to your situation. Then, are you free Tuesday at 6PM? Good, let’s meet and talk about how you are putting the principles of that passage into action.”
Congratulations, you just put three levels of tension on this person! First, if they really want to grow, they will open up the Bible and read the assigned passage. Second, if they are serious about this, they will not no-show you on Tuesday evening. Third, an eager disciple will have already found ways to apply this passage’s teaching on forgiveness. Now, a young disciple might waffle on one of those points, but a growing one will at least put effort into the challenge if they trust you and truly want to grow.

Do not put heavy demands on “little ones”

Jesus did not demand fasting from His young followers. Some disciples run people off because they put too heavy of a demand on new believers who are not ready to do “all that” yet. When my second son was still in Pampers, he loved to eat but was not motivated to move. We began to worry that he would never crawl. Knowing how much he loved food, we started holding out food for him from a couple feet away. He would get up on his hands and knees and rock back and forth. Finally, he put all four into gear and crawled to get the prize. Then, we increased the distance until he was crawling everywhere.
Later, he was crawling fine, but had not attempted to walk yet. He would stand and grab food off the table, if he could, but did not seem interested in walking. So, we started standing him up and holding food out a few feet away. Suddenly he was running everywhere. Yes, we still use food to motivate him!
Don’t discourage your new believer by telling them they have to fast for three days or memorize the book of Job. Give them simple challenges that will immediately benefit them. Milk, then meat. Crawl, then walk, then run.

Learn how to make disciples from horse training

You will never have a well-trained horse if you just wait for it to figure things out on its own. You will never have a well-trained horse if you beat and threaten it. Horses learn by one simple thing: pressure. Want them to stand and face you? Teach them that you will let off pressure when they turn toward you and do not walk away (in a round pen, of course).
Watch a professional horse trainer and you will see that they apply pressure with simple body movements and proximity to the horse. They know how to disciple the horse by walking up close or raising their hands. The horse does not like being in tension and will do whatever it takes to get into a comfortable zone where it is in harmony with the trainer.
Of course, the disciple is in training by the Spirit of God. They are disciples of Jesus Christ. However, the Lord has sent you to apply some of that healthy pressure so they can learn to respond to the Master Trainer as they grow.

Making-disciples verses in the OT?

You can find discipleship methods throughout the Bible. Just recently, the Lord brought to my awareness that Joseph in Egypt used the disciple-challenge process on his brothers.

Joseph was to look after his brothers, as the father of the family had instructed. It was a leadership role he had been given by the father of the family. When they came back into his life, he put them in a challenging situation. He told them to bring back his younger brother. Then, he listened in on their conversation (Genesis 42:20-24). They confessed to each other they wrong they had done wrong to Joseph. Confession of guilt is a great step toward being a true disciple of the Lord.
Then, when they have returned with his little brother Benjamin, Joseph put them in a tense situation again. He tested them to see how they would respond to the capture of his brother. Judah proved his change of heart by begging to take Benjamin’s place as a slave. When Joseph saw that they were not only aware of where they were wrong but also committed to live differently, he revealed his true identity to them. He rewarded them by offering access—they could come live under his protection and favor.

What are you looking for as you are making disciples?

It is easy to damage vulnerable disciples. Doing this work in the flesh—lashing out in anger, forcing your own way on a person, or ignoring those who are hungry—will create lasting damage to a disciple. All that you do must be done in the Spirit and with the leading of the Lord.
You will know your disciple is growing when he or she sees the errors of his or her own way like Reuben pointing out to his brothers that they were wrong for what they did with Joseph. They are growing when they exchange old habits and interests for things that please the Lord. They are developing into what He wants them to be when they cannot help but tell others the difference Jesus is making in their lives.

Please share what you are learning on how to disciple others or any making-disciples verses that stand out to you. Also, think back to how someone helped you mature as a disciple by putting godly pressure on you to grow up.